So by now I think we have all heard Yasmin Eleby’s story. The 40 year old married herself in a ceremony at the Houston Museum of African American culture followed by a lavish ceremony where she performed R. Kelly’s “I Believe I Can Fly” before her ten bridesmaids, family and friends. People Magazine reports that Eleby promised herself she would go through with the event if she did not have someone to marry by age 40.
I didn’t expect the story to get as much traction as it did, but it’s obvious we have social media to thank for that. I expected a few laughs and raised eyebrows here and there, but the tidal wave of opinions were quite alarming. People, especially women surprisingly, blamed Eleby’s event on everything from low self-esteem to feminism. But what I found missing from these jokes and discussions were the pressures women face to “have it all.” read more » » » »
A few weeks ago I read a past article online that said the holiday season is unofficially known as the breakup season as most couples call it quits due to the way this time of year tends to magnify pre-existing issues. I wasn’t surprised. I was, at the time, witnessing the final collapse of my relationship and knew that some of the new pangs of hurt I was experiencing was due to the wave of depression I knew that was surely coming to rattle my quiet shores at any moment. It’s one thing to lose your love, to lose what at one time illuminated your life like no other – it is quite another thing to lose them during one of the most special seasons of the year. read more » » » »
By now everyone on the Black blogosphere knows that Jill Scott is standing firmly behind Bill Cosby as the sage comedian continues to be bombarded with rape allegations. The soul singer took to twitter to express her opinion on the matter after an activist contacted Jill to ask her to sign a petition demanding Temple University to end their relationship with Cosby. Jill also went on to ask for proof of the allegations, as well as “advise” women to go to the hospital after a rape instead of showering. read more » » » »
By now everyone has heard the allegations of over 19 women alleging that they were raped by Bill Cosby. While most have been debating whether or not the allegations or true and if this will ruin Cosby’s legacy, there is this growing trend within this scandal has become too prominent to ignore: victim shaming. For each news account that posts an article on this story you’re bound to find plenty of comments slut shaming the women who have come forward, with people accusing them of being part of a conspiracy to undermine Cosby and of course being after the usual – money. What’s even more disturbing is that women are taking part in this victim-shaming, and I can no longer read these vile comments and stay silent. read more » » » »
This year has come with major ups and downs, most of them stemming from truths I can no longer run from. When I started my current job in mid-2013, it was definitely what I needed. With a degree in Political Science, it felt – and was – a dream come true to be able to find a job that completely aligned with not only my degree and my skill set. Fast forward to the present day, and let’s just say that my need has been fulfilled and I am dreaming new dreams. read more » » » »
Tyler Perry is arguably one of the most powerful Black men in Hollywood, and yet I know more people who dislike him and his work than I do those who are supporters. He’s been called everything – jigaboo, backwards, a poor writer, misogynist; and now with the announcement of an out-of-wedlock pregnancy with his long-time on-and off girlfriend, Gelila Bekele, we can now add hypocrite to the list. read more » » » »
This past Wednesday, September 24th was Bisexual Visibility Day, a time to celebrate those in the LGBTQ community who have an attraction to more than one gender. Of course, social media was filled with stories, shows of support and discussions regarding and involving those who are bisexual. One such discussion focused on whether or not women who identify as bisexual are more accepted and tolerated than bisexual men. It appeared that the majority voted “yes.” As the discussion pushed further in the affirmative direction, I disagreed and had my opinion dismissed as inaccurate. read more » » » »
Growing up in Brooklyn in the 90s you couldn’t help but stan for Lil Kim. She was feisty, arrogant, and could hang with the boys while still maintaining a feminine allure. Her lyrics were raunchy and defiant, definitely not what pre-teen girls should have been listening to, but my friends and I could not help but pull out our walkmans and spin her CDs when adults weren’t around.
As I grew from a pre-teen into an adult, my appreciation for who Lil’ Kim was and what she was able to do in hip hop matured. She didn’t abandon the America’s Sweetheart image as other artist like Mariah Carey would do in the late 90s (more on her later), she completely rejected it and decided to make her sexuality part of her image. She was sex-positive, reaffirming herself and power in ways that only white celebrities like Madonna were able to do. read more » » » »