I mean really, who wouldn’t want to hate us. We’re bold, beautiful and walk around with an “S” on our chest. But has our confident language and lioness manes produced an unwritten, yet very visible “No Trespassing” sign outside our lavish community gates?
Many times when you are in the “in” crowd you can’t see any harm in what you’re doing.
You go through the day hanging out with your friends and label the motives of those against you with one word “HATERS.” We figure “you hate me cause you ain’t me.” The question is: Is the natural hair community any different?
We are the current “cool” kids in the Black online community. Us along with the celebrity gossip/fashion sites. The difference being our community is soley built on top of a foundation of love — the love of natural hair, the love of spreading knowledge and for many of us the newly found self-love. Yet, in this on and off-line community of organic love some people don’t feel welcome and you know who I’m talking about. The relaxed sista. She just can’t seem to feel relaxed in some of our presence. She feels that we have created a community that speaks down to the personal choice they have made to wear their hair straight.
I remember being in middle school and writing a poem about black love. All the white kids started calling me racist and I couldn’t understand why. Because I believed back then as I believe today that preaching black love is not simultaneous to preaching white hate. And I believe this principle can be carried over into the natural black hair community. Preaching natural hair love is not preaching relaxed hair hate.
But how do we explain this to our relaxed hair sista, because its imperative that she be informed.
For years we have read in magazines and people have published numerous books about the hating community of Black women. They claimed we beat each other up with our insensitive words and “what the hell she starring at” eye language. But here in 2010 the natural hair community stands as a force rivaling these beliefs. On and offline we are calling each other beautiful. We are embracing our “natural hair.” We are building a community so strong and large that Big Brother himself has to take a gander at his reflection before trying to barge in and market us his products.
We have a good thing going here and we should let our relaxed sisters in on it. We can’t let them think we are putting them down for being in the same situation we were in a couple of years, months or days ago. So how do we do it? How do we allow all of our sistas to feel welcomed into this community of love? How do we invite them to partake in our conversations about the power of hair, because they have a voice too?
Do you think we should even care? Or just carry on as we were because we didn’t mean any harm?