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Is Your Booty Call Boyfriend Material?

posted by Ci Ci Foster on October 3rd, 2012 at 10:34 am

How to Know if Your Booty Call is Boyfriend Material How to Get Him to Commit 152x250 Is Your Booty Call Boyfriend Material?

How to Know if Your Booty Call is Boyfriend Material & How to Get Him to Commit

Have you been having hot, mind-blowing sex with a guy and have now began to catch feelings for him? Do you want to be more than just his booty call? Many single women find themselves in this situation. They hook up with a guy for quick sex and find themselves sprung and wanting more.

Sex can be a powerful drug, and can cause many women to believe their bedmate is their soul mate. Before you start fantasizing about your sexy mandingo being your man, be sure that you are not blinded by the good sex you are having and start learning who the man really is to determine if you truly want more than what his ‘package’ offers.

1. Know what you are looking for in a potential mate. Write at least 10 of the most important qualities you want and need in a mate. Once you know what you want, you will know it when you see it.

2. Start going on dates and spending quality time together. The more time you spend outside of the bedroom, the more you will get to see the guy’s true character. If he cancels dates regularly, seems preoccupied, or does not give you attention or treat you well, you will know that he is not the one for you. (Extra tip: During this time, be sure to date other men so you won’t be so focused on him.)

3. Focus on his actions and your intuition-Many men looking for sex won’t devote time in dating you, or if they do, they won’t be consistent. You will know if he is boyfriend material by the way he treats you. He will be attentive and ask to take you out. He will not look at other women and you will get his undivided attention. Focus also on how you feel when you are with him. Listen to your heart, not your throbbing cookie! If you feel good around him and about him and his actions are consistent and sincere, he may be a keeper!

4. If you begin dating on a regular basis and you realize you like the man beyond his ‘package,’ be authentic. Express your true expectations and find out if he is open to being exclusive or just wants to keep hooking up. If there is no interest, know that you cannot change someone into who you want them to be. Accept the fact that he only wants sex and move on with someone who wants a relationship. No matter how good the sex is or how tight your goodies are, you cannot make a man commit to you.

5. If your lover is interested in becoming your man, continue to date him regularly, but don’t ask for a relationship too quickly. If you ask for a relationship too quickly, you will seem desperate and men like confidence, not neediness. Give the relationship time to blossom. Make sure you are communicating over the phone several times a week. Contrary to popular belief, texting does not make up for real dialogue! Make sure you are communicating over the phone a few times per week. This helps you and your man to connect and is the sign of a real relationship.

6. After a few months of dating, see where the relationship is going and re-establish new rules for your relationship. In order to move completely beyond being just a booty call, you must give your potential boyfriend new rules to follow to secure the relationship you desire. Tell him your expectations; what you will and won’t accept and make the commitment to the relationship. It is important that both people are on the same page and truly want to be in a relationship. I cannot stress this enough. If you find yourself doing the majority of the calling, texting, or are just getting lip service, it may mean your man isn’t truly committed to you. Have honest, open dialogue and if he doesn’t measure up, he was meant to be your booty call and not your man.

Ci Ci Foster is a relationship advice expert and the author of Sunny Rain, a sexy tale of love, lust and drama. Visit www.CiCiFoster.com for more information.

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11 Comments

  1. How bout stop doing ish a$$ backwards, and don’t sex dudes that are not your man officially or better yet your husband.
    That might cut out the confusion or you tryna stategize your way into his heart after he done been all up inside you!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Amen OSHH!!! Close Ya Legs Women till you get that Ring!!!

  3. YES! @ OSHH and OH YEAH!

  4. What OSHH said. It’s not that hard or that complicated.

  5. That is so true Oshh. I have done it many times with men. You can’t and should not have sex with every man you meet. I got married 5 almost 6 years ago and we had out first child 3 years ago. Now we are on our way to continuing to build our family.

  6. Old Popeye Salt

    Ladies, if he is just a booty call leave as such. If the sex came before the friendship/dating you are doomed to try and make it into a real relationship….

  7. I don’t know. When considering this question I always reference that Sex in the City episode where Carrie tries to date her booty call and fails miserably. Sometimes people are put into dating categories for a reason.

  8. This article as been up forever!! If your relationship starts off as a booty call why in the world would he commit when he’s already getting the booty for free. Because he love you? really ladies. Sex is a big distraction if it starts in the beginning of a relationship, get to know one another first before getting physical you will find this much more rewarding overall.

  9. This is really informative article.

  10. Elizabeth McGee

    Saying things such as “close your legs” and “no sex before marriage,” is the worst form of slutshaming within our gender. As women, we have the freedom to exercise our right to say yes when and where we want. If you want to fuck a man you just met, do it. If you want to wait and fuck him after you get married, do that as well. Either way, always know what you want, and stay safe. Women’s ultimate goal is not always to be married with children.

  11. Captain Johnson

    You go Liz. I mean if you get a job they want work history, go to Dr. they want medical history, car insurance they want driving history, police stop you they want criminal history, apply for college they want a transcript. Why? Your history tells us who you are and is a predictor of future behavior. You want to be tattooed as a booty call and lose woman, go to it. For the rest, act appropriate and a quality man might actually want you.