Love at First Sight

The idea that you could meet your soul mate at any given point in your life, if you haven’t found them, already is an exhilarating feeling. I don’t know if I believe there is just one soul mate and perhaps the concept of a soul mate is obtuse to me but thinking about the possibly brings a smile to my face. But is it likely to see someone and instantly fall in love with them? Does love at first sight really exist?

I would definitely classify myself as a realist when it comes to matters of the heart. My beliefs are more optimistic than pessimistic but I try not to let the glitz and glamour of love blind. This is probably the result of getting hurt in the past. Once you’ve been hurt by a former mate, you can turn into one of two people: The person adamant about finding love again, clinging to any hopes of finding someone else and finding solace in the idea that love is out there for you and your soul mate is just a stone’s throw away or you can turn cold and your heart morphs into the icebox Omarion was referring to in his song. Your hopes of finding someone to spend your life with may be vanquished.

I find that those who believe in love at first sight are often those optimistic individuals who may or may not have found love before but who are certain that it is possible to see someone and instantly fall in love. I think the idea of love at first sight is absolutely preposterous. First of all, it shouldn’t be called love at first sight; it should be called lust at first sight. How can you love someone you’ve never spoken to? How can you love someone that you know nothing about? You may have fallen in love with their exterior but you know nothing about them as a person. They could be the crudest, craziest, most difficult person to put up with but you were so fixated on their looks that you failed to notice. It is possible to meet someone and make an instant connection with them. But without having spoken to a person, how could you possibly feel that intense, indescribable feeling that they call love? I believe in faith and I believe people are placed into our lives for a particular reason. But I don’t believe you can see someone, from a far, and instantly fall in love with them. Love is more than just attraction; love is that unconditional devotion and undying adoration you feel. Love is something intimate and the idea that you could see someone and instantly experience that intense feeling is ludicrous and demeaning to the true idea of love.

Janice Gassam is a graduate student currently getting her degree in Industrial Organizational Psychology. To contact Janice her email is
You can also add her on any of the following social network sites.
Youtube Channel:


  1. Nice post! I agree with you, and my advice is to always remember that any partner comes with a relationship history, therefore you must know the partner better in order to determine whether he/she is the one.

  2. I do believe men know when they meet a woman if she is the one. I say this to say I have worked for almost 20 years in a maled dominated industry and when I speak to them about life and love they all have said the same thing to me when I met my wife I just knew. They couldn’t explain it but they knew. I have grown listening to my dad say the same thing aobut my Mom.

    Maybe that is why they say he that seeks a wife finds a good thing because that is the way it is suppose to be. And, also, maybe that is why our communities and dating world seems so out of whack because things are not going according to his plan.

  3. beautiful article. i do believe in love at first sight and the idea that you just know that person is the one for you makes it even more worth your time to invest in it for the long haul. and believe me just because you think that does not mean it is lust because not everyone who says that is a looker or even someone who might invoke lust, but rather it is their spirit or like i believe their aura or oomph factor. we are spirit beings as such our mind and flesh does not always tell us what to do or feel, but we do have instinct that gives us that gut feeling that, thats the one and then we grow in love with the one we instantly loved because of the pull of their spirit.

  4. Most people who think they have fallen in love at first sight have really fallen in lust. They see someone and desire to be with them. That isn’t love though. Love can only come from getting to know someone and that takes time.

Comments are closed.