Like most of you I have been thinking about the Presidential Elections lately. Many Americans have been consumed with the fact that we may possibly have a woman or Black man as the nation’s next leader. However, I have been consumed with the fact that we may very well be on the verge of not only having a Black President, but a Black First Lady as well. Now, we can all be honest here and admit that we probably all felt that if ever a Black man was to ascend to the highest office in the land, chances are his wife would not have been Black. Thus we may have had a Brotha at the top, but not a sista, which would have been a hollow victory for Black women as we also want and need to ourselves at the top as well. This all of course leads me to our “Question Of The Day” as posted on Cocoa Lounge.
What, if anything, do you believe it would mean to Black women to see another Black woman as the nation’s First Lady?
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To be honest, it would mean that some will be extremely critical of her (for no good reason) simply because she’s a Black Woman
and that’s just what some of us do 
But, for the rest of us that are proud, wise and progressive, Michelle Obama’s role as First Lady would be icing on the cake, because we already know how strong, powerful, dedicated, nurturing, spiritual and intelligent the Black Woman truly is.
We’ve been leading the Black Race for as long as I can remember…Michelle is sweet icing
Go get’em, girl
I dispute the basis of your question. “If ever a black man was to ascend to the highest office in the land, chances are his wife would not have been black”. Wouldn’t happen. If Obama had had a white wife the questions of “Is he black enough?” would never have gone away, black women – a key part of his base – would have been turned off and not voted for him and he’d be headed back to Chicago.
A Black man married to a White woman would NEVER be President of the United States. When I think of all of the Black men in Hollywood who are at the top of their game, they are all married to Black women. People respect that more. Most people look at a Black man who’s married to White women as a stereotype.
[quote comment="21481"]I dispute the basis of your question. “If ever a black man was to ascend to the highest office in the land, chances are his wife would not have been black”. Wouldn’t happen. If Obama had had a white wife the questions of “Is he black enough?” would never have gone away, black women – a key part of his base – would have been turned off and not voted for him and he’d be headed back to Chicago.[/quote]
But this would have been fine with White America who would have viewed his White wife as a sign that he “LOVED” them. Black women are only a small part of voters overall and an election can be easily won without them by a Democrat or Republican candidate. I too would havenever though the first Black President would have had a Black wife, much less one who is dark complected.
[quote comment="21483"]When I think of all of the Black men in Hollywood who are at the top of their game, they are all married to Black women.[quote]They are? I have a whole list that are married to White women,right down to the leader of the goold old NAACP. Black men of wealth and power have always chosen White wives because they match their status. This falls right in line with the stat that says 70% of Black men who make over $100,000 a year have White wives. Hanging with YT has always been a sure sign of a sellout and why White America loves such Black people, espacially the men.
Val I second that!!!!
@ val but there are white people who hate black people period. and those who hate seeing black men with white women. so i agree he would of been headed back to chicago.
Having a Black woman as First Lady would not only be a boon to Black Women, but to young black girls as well. Having a Black family in the White House opens up worlds of possiblity for our children because they’ll see their own potential! How exciting is that!? I get all tingly when I see Michelle because she represents most of the Black women I know! We should all be excited to see Michelle doing her thang.
And TRUST, she can handle all of the criticism that comes her way because she is very self-aware and is prepared for it all.
I think that MICHELLE is particularly well suited for the role. She is just one very well put together woman. Incredibly articulate, intelligent, measured. If I could ever imagine that a black woman would be first lady, I would have hoped for one like her.
I also don’t believe that Obama would have a chance in hell of getting elected with a white wife. Racism runs too deep in this country and the black man/white woman issue is at the root of a lot of the lynchings and violence that have perpetuated our history.
He made a good choice with Michelle.
I think it is very inspiring. I have read alot about her and she is very inspiring. At first I didn’t like her I thought she was a little too rough with some of the things she’d say but hey not everyone is soft spoken & passive so. what the heck!
“But this would have been fine with White America who would have viewed his White wife as a sign that he “LOVED” them”.
No it wouldn’t have. White America doesn’t like interracial couples – it never has. A president has “power” over a nation – can you imagine how white men would feel, already uncomfortable with a black man having power over them, now that black man has one of their women too? no way they vote for him.
also look at what happened with that show “the adventures of old christine” – last season it was praised to the sky, won an emmy award. this season i’m reading how people are saying the show isn’t any good any more. what happened? Christine hooked up with blair underwood.
“Black women are only a small part of voters overall and an election can be easily won without them by a Democrat or Republican candidate”
that’s true. but they are a BIG part of any black candidates (really any democratic candidate too – if hilary wins the nomination, without black women, she goes home too) base of support and if you’re base doesn’t vote for you, no one else will.
I think that having a MARRIED, EDUCTATED, NO ******* CHILDREN HAVING, black woman as a first lady will inspire many girls to take her route. I think that seeing Michelle will force some girls to think beyond “this stupid moment in my life”, you know. It may make them say, “Heeeey… Ray Ray is not giving me the respect I deserve. I want to be a WIFE before a MOTHER… I want a respecful man, too… I want to go to Harvard too…” etc.
Oprah provided an example for women who don’t want marriage and kids, but still want success. Oprah gave heavier black women a role model. But Michelle can be the role model for those of us who do want familys and husbands and success. She works out, stands by her man, has a good head on her shoulder, and is a success in her own right. She’s who most of us strive to be – or would love our daughters to become!
^ ****** = the biblical term for illigitimate children, of which I DO have one.
First off, I still can not believe that we just might have a black family in the White House! I always knew that this would happen… one day. I kinda envisioned the state of black people as a whole (women and men) to be on a different level (higher) economical. However, the sisters are the new middle class families and to top it off we may have a black First Lady. This is truely a revolution. I look at women like Michelle Obama, Condelezza Rice, Tyra Banks, Oprah, and various women in entertainment and Hollywood and I know that black women are much much more then the negative images we see on TV. Each woman stated above (and those not mentioned who have made a difference in our community) have their own struggles that they’ve overcome. It’s nice to see that with all the flack we have to deal with, the cream stills rises to the top. As stated above we have been carrying this country since we settled onto this American soil. Our determination, strength, pain, and self intervention will continue to contradict what society says we are. I know I have gotten off the topic but to some it up, having a black First Lady will be the greatest feat since The Civil Rights Movement.
We need to ask ourselves “what could I do to better myself and my situation; whatever it may be”? It is our chance to start Leading By Example.
The majority of extremely successful black men have black wives. He would not have made it this far if he had a black wife. Be real clear about that because white men would not have voted for him. He has more that half of white men voting for him. That would not have happened if his wife were white. I think it is time for black people to get over some of our own insecuritites that we have by ourselves. Because times are changing with or without us.
I meant he would not have made it this far if he had a white wife. That is really just mostly athletes for some reason.
I am not a heavy girl and I am 100% inspired by Oprah. Oprah is an inspiration to every one, she has cross racial and gender boundaries. I know what you are saying Smokie but we cannot limit Oprah accomplishments to a certain type of woman. Monique is probably someone heavier women look up too esthetically. Oprah has cross the waters of sea, all up in Africa.
I have never labored under (IMO) the false impression “that if ever a black man was to ascend to the highest office in the land, chances are his wife would not have been black.” In fact, I have always believed just the opposite – that the first African American president would have to possess unassailable credentials, an intact marriage with a readily identifible black woman (no Kimora Lees) sans any hint of la’ affair, and the obligatory 2-3 kids. In other words, he would likely have come from the pool of the talent tenth. To suggest otherwise fails to take into account the conservative nature of politics — be it Dem or Rep — versus that found in entertainment and sports. If you don’t believe me, give Harold Ford a call. The mere mention of him dating White women cost him the election in TN — Now he’s gone and gotten engaged/married to a blond, blue eyed blue blood. Ford was supposed to be where Obama is now. He’s been being groomed by the establishment for years and now where is he? Haven’t heard a peep from him. He’s damaged goods.
If you’ll take a look at the next generation of black politicians –The next group of Obamas –they are just like him – See Deval Patrick in Mass. – married to a black woman. Adrian Fenty in DC – married to a black woman who is also an attorney. Corey Booker in NJ – not married but any woman he has been rumored to be dating (including Gayle King) has been black. Each has been called upon by the establishment during this election season and have all wholeheartedly supported Obama. All this to say that the First African American president MUST be authentically/culturally black because he will need a ground swell of support from the black community and in particular, black women (assuming a Dem candidate) to win. Be the voter Black or White – we all have deeply held prejudices and it will take another generation or two before a black man or woman can just “be” without having to succumb to the caustic and condescending test of “being black enough.”
Now on to the question posed – yes, I believe having Michelle Obama as the first lady will be met with a sense of pride and in many corners vindication by a certain segment of African American women. Vindication some of you may ask? Yes, vindication. Michelle Obama is not an anomoly – there are many black women who have achieved as much or more than Michelle but they never receive the deserved accolades. When is the last time you read an article (i believe the mere mention of putting one of them on the cover would be the same as suggesting that Susan Taylor get a weave – ain’t happenin’) in Essence about Pamela Joyner, Ann Fudge, Ursula Barnes or Mellody Hobson (ok, Mellody once or twice got a shoutout buried somewhere in a column). For them, Michelle validates choices they have made, their power and their existence (beyond their bodies) — Mainstream black america only seems to crown/reward the sexy and sassy brown sista. With Michelle as first lady, their ascendence into the corridors of power is nearly complete.
With respect to our other brown sistas – those that just can’t seem to close the achievement gap and who have all other sorts of drama that prevents them from being the women they were born to be – I hope that Michelle’s story inspires them to:(1) find out what their endagame is and work towards it (i.e., delay gratification to reach the real goal; financial security, loving/strong relationship, and good health), (2) see what a truly strong women is (i.e., Claire Huxatable pt.II in living color) – we’ve all watched Michelle slice and dice interviewers without raising her voice, placing one hand on her hip, or shaking her head, (3) that to support your man you don’t have to lose your self-worth and self-esteem, and (4) what black love is SUPPOSED to look like – these two ooze love for each other. No faux relationship here. We know where they stand – FOR EACH OTHER! When you have two people who love and respect each other completely they can take on the world or at least, the U.S. presidency.
The above comment is just excellent.
Mrs. Obama’s intelligence, polish and other factors, IMO, are helping Sen. Obama immeasurably. We (AfAm women) are probably the majority of our part of the electorate, and it’s a good, positive image that Sen. Obama chose a visibly black woman as his wife and life partner.
I suspect that HFJr. is probably kicking himself in private moments, although if he runs for office from either New York or California, both coastal blue states, he might have somewhat of a chance. His career is toast in other areas.
I will be so excited. She will influence so many mothers, daughters, sisters, aunts, etc. to see and believe that we don’t have to settle for mediocre. :bowdown: Phenomenal Woman!!! :bowdown: Good fortune to her!
“Now, we can all be honest here and admit that we probably all felt that if ever a Black man was to ascend to the highest office in the land, chances are his wife would not have been Black”
I’m sorry but that comment was completely on called for to assume that his wife would probably not be black. True there are plenty of men who marry outside of the race, but so what there are plenty of successful black men married to black women and if yall dont know any of them, you need to get out and start traveling in the right circles. Saying comments like this and some of yall wonder why you cant find a decent black man.
minus the need to put down my sistas, I will say that Michelle Obama will make every woman proud. From the sista in the board room to the sista in the projects and I hope she dosen’t feel the same way about black women as some of you on here. Michelle is Intellegent……..at the same time she is beautuful, sexy, and hot……you CAN have both
To rich *****
Some of us are married, to black men at that but, that doesnt mean that we arent concern about our fellow sisters who feel the fustrations of the black man “selling out”.
Hey Folks, there seems to be disagreement about whether elite (moneyed and/or educated) Black men marry White women at high rates. I did some quick research and turned up this:
“At lower income levels, the ratio of both-black marriages to mixed race marriages is heavily skewed towards both-black couples, each notch up on the income ladder brings the two figures into closer alignment, until at the highest income level ($100,000 and above) they are nearly even, with 86,443 both-black couples and 75,410 mixed race couples. A similar phenomenon is apparent for educational attainment. At the “non high school graduate” level, there are more than four times as many both-black couples as mixed race couples, but with each step of educational attainment, the figures get closer. At the “graduate or professional degree” level they were again almost even, with 160,367 both-black couples and 146,763 mixed race couples (STATS 1.)
“That study, “Can Intermarriage Make You Smarter and Richer?” basically states that the more better off people are, with respect to either education or income, the more likely they are to be in some type of interracial marriage.”[1]
Here’s the interesting quotation from another study:
“Black-white couples show a definite pattern: 74 percent involve a black husband and a white wife.”
“… most black-white couples have similar educations; nonetheless, white women who marry black men “marry up” more often than those who marry white men. This is especially striking because the pool of highly educated white men greatly outnumbers the pool of highly educated black men. More than half of black husbands of white women have at least some college education, but only two-fifths of black husbands of black women do. In that sense, white wives get more than their “share” of well-educated black husbands.”[2]
So,… more money / education more interracial marriage, at least for men. Most do marry someone of the same education, but white women who marry interracially “marry up” (marry someone more educated) at a compararbly high rate.
Lates, ILBW
[1] “Why Are Black/White Marriages So Rare?,” Grant Crosslin, 2003, http://home.att.net/~grantburger/paper.html
[2] “Breaking The Last Taboo: Interracial Marriage,” by Zenchao Qian, 2005, http://www.neiu.edu/~sociolgy/soc_club_files/inter_marriage/
Breaking_the_Last_Taboo__Interracial_Marriage.pdf
(I didn’t check the references in the articles–Zenchao Qian is a social scientist.)
[quote comment="21521"]When is the last time you read an article … in Essence about Pamela Joyner, Ann Fudge, Ursula Barnes or Mellody Hobson[/quote]
Who’s Ursula Barnes?
[quote comment="21521"]Mainstream black america only seems to crown/reward the sexy and sassy brown sista.[/quote]
[quote comment="21521"]I hope that Michelle’s story inspires them to: … what black love is SUPPOSED to look like – these two ooze love for each other.[/quote]
Say “word.”
@ IBLW
Multitasking and typing don’t always mix – Her name is “Ursula Burns” – she single handedly turned around Xerox and is considered one of the top female businesswomen in the country. I believe at this time she is the only black women heading a Fortune 500. With the loss of Stan O’Neil, Richard Parsons retiring, and the CEO who was just forced out at Sears, she may now be only one of two or three remaining black CEOs — male or female — who heads a Fortune 500 in the country.
Ursula Burns is the President of Xerox . Anne Mulcahy is the CEO.
To rich *****
Some of us are married, to black men at that but, that doesnt mean that we arent concern about our fellow sisters who feel the fustrations of the black man “selling out”.
Feeling fustrations, if he’s not your man you aint got nothing to worry about. Its his life his business but to assume he’s going to “sell out” just beacause he’s successful if ridiculous. I think it says a lot about black women in general if they are supprised a successful black man has a black woman on his arm. This is not new.
I want to ask you something Stephanie. Do you think because Black men hold some type high status, that alot of them wouldnt be married to a black women. Do get me wrong, there are those who do leave home but not all of them are like that. Im saying this because you ask a question that kinda of irked me. Never once did I think if a black man became president, his wife wouldnt be black. But anyways, carry on.
I meant *Dont*
Oh and Seeing Michelle Obama as a possible First Black Lady makes my heart sing. Im hoping many young brothers and sisters see this for positive reinforcement. When you have strong black family and strong genuine love for one another, we are unshakable.
If only a man, or a woman could be judged or acts and facts rather than on skin…
A wild guess is there are as many white gold diggers as black, brown, yellow or rainbow gold diggers (yes, gay as well).
A wild guess is that men successful financially are not always best suited when it comes to social skills to know when somebody is a gold digger. Same thing for a successful women, I guess. Indeed, the time invested in being successful is time not spent honing social skills…
But, hey, I might be wrong.
Reality is, however, if Barak or Hillary are elected president, they will be judged more harshly than the previous pres due to their col
our/gender…
Y’ll cant see dat Obamas ole lady is bout half white herself. Aint no african, just mulato or som ****. Hi yello ! Ashy! no wht im sayin. Not ful coon or like dat **** but mitely clos.