Stacy Dash Is Old & Should Act Her Age

I have heard people say that about Janet Jackson a million times and poor Mariah, as she inches closer and closer to 40, more and more people are starting to say the same thing about her. Sadly, ageism against women is alive and well- but I find Stacy Dash seems to be spared those types of comments even though she is 42 years old- the exact same age as Janet Jackson. And though I love me some Stacy, she stay butt nekkid up in men’s magazines and no one ever questions her motives or mentions her age- except to praise her of course. So why does Stacy get spared the nasty comments about dressing and posing scantily clad in magazines, while Mariah, and Janet in particular, are scolded? Well my belief is that she’s just not as big a star as Janet and Mariah. When you are at the top folks like to see you fall and fall big. So while Janet and Mariah are told to get dressed, grow up or flat out retire- Stacy gets a pass basically because she is a d-list Black actress who doesn’t have much else to offer but her good looks. Still, I am all for Stacy flaunting what she has- if that’s what makes her feel good. Women do not shrivel up and die at 40 and they definitely don’t stop being sexy or sexual beings- as Stacy so clearly demonstrates in the pic to your right.


  1. I agree. I’m all for women being who they want to be. I hope when I reach 40 I look as good as Janet, Mariah or Stacy. These women are redefining what it means to be 40 and I say more power to them all. As women we will all be there one day so we shouldn’t seek to tear any of these women down. Age is nothing but a number. Besides Tina Turner rocked a mini well into her 60s.

  2. And for those of you who may be slow and thus tempted to send me HATE mail. The title of this post is not how I truly feel about Stacy. It was used to simply make a point. 😆

  3. I love the way you just put things out there Stephanie. Indeed what we say about ppl is generally predicated on how we feel about those persons. I haven’t read one negative comment about Stacy on any of the blogs I have read today but you know had this been Janet, Mariah, Meagan Good, Gabrielle Union or heaven forbid, Beyonce, folks would have been having a hissy fit. I feel you on the age thing too cause it truly is just another things people use to hate on people they don’t like. I don’t care how old a woman is, a beautiful woman is a beautiful woman and that is all that matters.

  4. Stacy always looks good in Black magazines. Playboy did her all types of wrong though cause she didn’t hardly look this hot naked or dressed in their magazine. Playboy has no love for brown skin women at all. Stacy and Garcelle’s pics were busted if you ask me.

  5. “to each is his own” pay those bills Stacy! i am not mad at her cause she does look better than most at 42! and yeah alot of us self respecting working women/mothers wouldnt dare! but if we were dime pieces with bills we might so lets not dog her. i just hope she had been out auditioning before she took it here!

  6. Stacy is a beautiful woman , but is it really necessary to pose like this. It’s getting old and so IS SHE! I hate to go all Oprah, but as black women we need to respect ourselves.
    She could go haul her backside a job instead of posing for men’s mags all day long. She looks just as low rent as the other chick Lola.

  7. If she likes it then I love it!!!!!!! Just because she’s 42 dosen’t mean that she’s dried up and wrinkly. She still looks good and nobody would of mentioned her age I would of assumed that she was around 30-35. Besides I’d rather hear about her then this whole thing with Jay and Beyonce!

  8. I did not know she was that old she look really good. I have some years b4 i hit 40 and im going make sure i look good as her. Like you said age is nothing but a number as long your rock it right there should not be a problem. You do not have to be slutty with it just make it grown and sexy.

  9. What’s the purpose of her being on the cover? Is she promoting anything? Does she have a movie coming out? I’ve seen other actresses in King Magazine (Malinda Williams being one off the top of my head), but they actually have some kind of career. I really have no problem with Stacy showing her “assets”. Girl, if you got it, flaunt it. But at least have a motive or a reason behind the “behind”!

  10. I think once a woman reaches a certain age especially with children, she should think carefully on the decisions she makes period. Stacey has a teenage son, im sure his boys are like wow. Granted she is a beautiful woman but im sure she has more talents other than posing for King. Can’t wait to see some of her new movies.

  11. I think they should do what makes them feel good young and happy. Plus she’s a celeb. She has a huge male fan base that wants to see her like this. she got the look, the body, and the fan base so yes let her do her. We all will be her age one day and please tell me that if your man wanted you to do a sexy sexy photo spread you wouldn’t. Just my thoughts….and you KILL’EM STACY!

  12. Stacy looks good! She’s gotten thick!!
    I absolutely love her (but maybe I’m being bias because ppl tell me I look like her)! Now, if I can get my body tight like hers and keep it like that pass my 40’s- I’ma be straght!

    ANYway, I’m in the middle on this one. I always feel women (at any age) should not allow themselves to be displayed as “objects” to men but I also know what world we live in. Some women (celeb or not) just want that kind of attn, is it bad? *shrugs* To each it’s own.

  13. she looks good and i think she is grown enough to make her own decision its all about confidence,We have the same body type and i feel confident enough not to wear scrumpious outfit to flaunt it and feel better let her do her

  14. Mmmm, I was at another blog today and the posters there were like WHY? She’s gorgeous. We know this. But her booty-cheeks are HANGING OUT; basically she’s in her drawers….. I don’t understand why she did this. Does KING magazine pay that much for photos? Is it the money? Is it she’s promoting something (other than her derrière and awesome figure)? WTF? Why? 🙁

  15. why are black women always taking ass shots like thats the only thing they want to be known for? i wonder your goddess oprah says about stuff like this ! can we blame it on rap too? smh


  17. I have been researching black pin-up girls from the 50’s and I couldn’t find a single one.

    That bugged me. I like the pin up style, look, swag, etc.
    Black women are beautiful, sexy, alluring, etc. and would have made gorgeous pin-up models. Some women made their livings (very good livings) for nothing more than looking good in print (see betti page)

    Stacy Dash, Trina, Tocarra, Delicious, Buffy the Body, Melyssa Ford would all make fabulous pin up models. There is nothing shameful about that.

    what we might want to ask ourselves is why is it the case that Anna Nicole Smith RIP and Pamela Anderson are just considered “pretty” and”sexy” when displayed this way, but a black woman is considered whorish, nasty, etc. Why is there a difference? Don’t worry…I”ll wait….

    Answer: racism. Internalized self hatred. We believe all the lies they told us. We believe we are less than and therefore bad.
    Unlearn that bull…its old and it makes you ugly and tired, insecure and ashamed.

    I’m noy mad at Stacy. I’m proud she is 42. It gives me something to work towards at 34. I’m not mad at any beautiful sister who gets paid for being gorgeous (not even crazy Naomi…I love that sister and if I had a few obscenely expensive bags that just disappeared at the airport, I would wig out too..).

    Not going to preach, but please examine where those ideas come from…why is Carmen Electra sexy–but Buffy the Body is a hoe? What’s different? Its not talent…its race. We need to reject that madonna whore complex because its damaging to the female psyche.

  18. @Oliver

    Shut up and go away. Go to a Pamela Anderson or Carmen Electra post–and ask the white people there why do white women always pose in photographs that emphasize silicone breasts and plastic booties.

    I do think you have a case of “real bootie envy”.

    In fact, I think envy is the real reason that mainstream culture continues to tell black women they should be ashamed of their beauty and cover it up.

    You will have to go run that game on “slow” black people. You ran into the smart ones in here.

  19. @Oliver, I KNOW you are white now–we respect Oprah, but she is only “goddess” to middle classed white women. hahahahahahahahahah 🙂

  20. @ Nef
    That was cold. LOL

    Also want to add that I have always thought she is one of the most beautiful actresses. I hope she is working on expanding her repertoire. Maybe her brother Damian could throw some money her way and let her create a vehicle to display her other gifts besides that fabulous booty.

  21. “why are black women always taking *** shots like thats the only thing they want to be known for? ”
    I actually wonder the same thing ….

  22. I’ve actually always felt pam anderson and anna nicole were slutty not sexy. They’re no exception simply because they’re white (at least not for me and I would assume several other black women).


  24. In my book (and possibly several other black womens’) I’ve never considered Anna Nicole or Pam Anderson simply pretty or sexy. They actually seem far more whorish then the black women previously mentioned (IMO).

    Perhaps instead of internalized racism the issue may be based on the fact that we as a people tend to consider the actions of other individuals a reflection on the race at large, we hold our own women to a higher standard. We’re all familiar with the “they just had to be black” school of thought.

  25. @lovingme

    I respect your opinion and acknowledge that you are entitled to it. I offer this to you in response, if you walk into a room, with full knowledge that you are stunning and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you–you will be less likely to get self-conscious because a person snickers for reasons unknown.

    On the other hand, if you secretly harbor insecurities and “aren’t quite sure” whether or not you have it all together–when a person snickers, you just might wonder “are they snickering at me?”

    Perhaps we should ask ourselves why we choose to identify with every black woman with a sense of embarrassment rather than to identify what is beautiful and positive about that woman.

    For the record, I grew up in an environment that required long skirts, no pants, no shorts, and you dare not be seen half naked anywhere–including swimming class!

    To this day, I don’t wear pants, I wear all of my skirts below my calves and I have a fit if I’m showing too much cleavage despite the fact that with a triple DDD cup, its near impossible not to show cleavage. I am a very modest dresser.

    Even so, I can appreciate a beautiful sister when I see one, and I feel no embarrassment at the sight of them. Just as I’m sure white women don’t feel embarrased when they see the women their community holds up as “beautiful”.

    That’s my opinon. You are entitled to yours as well.

  26. @darksister

    Come on now sis–you just gave us the recipe for a bodacious behind–(soy milk) so you know why they are posing that way–because a curvy behind is a beauty standard in the black community. (here ends the portion of this post directed at you sis, the rest is general.)

    AND THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. White supremacy and racism have convinced us that everything we consider beautiful from our own cultural perspective, is somehow flawed.

    Yet, as I have said before, I will bet you that butt injections are the brainchild of some skinny non-black woman.

    Will they be known for that? Perhaps.

    Marilyn Monroe wasn’t famous for her acting.

    Dolly Parton isn’t known because her singing is so great.

    How many box bleach blondes are famous in this country–just for being bleach blondes?

    Black women with beautiful, curvy behinds, just might end up being known for it. That’s ok…maybe they have nothing else to offer–they have to eat too! *smiling at you.

    As long as we are producing Oprah’s, Condoleezas, Doctors, Lawyers, Teachers, Business Women, etc. (and we have for centuries here) why are we so embarrased that someone gets on the cover of a girly magazine because she has a nice shape?

    The Flavor of Love is embarrassing to me..I find it excrutiatingly annoying and full of coonery and buffoonery…..

    A pretty black woman in lingerie on the cover of a “girly” magazine–is just a pretty black woman, in lingerie, on the cover of a magazine.

    Would any of you prefer that they start putting white girls on the cover–like they have in all of the videos?

  27. @Pearlsrevealed

    I think Dame Dash is strapped for cash after the buy out of Roc a Fella

  28. I had to ask hubby whether I was “losing it” on this issue because I seem so out of step with my sisters… He asked me these questions:

    “What is LL Cool J known for…his rapping skills, or taking his shirt off? and which magazine are you more likely to buy, the one with LL Cool J shirtless on the cover, or one with Flavor Flave on the cover?”

    Answer…LL Cool J…hands down.

    So can we say that LL Cool J has his shirt off in most of his pictures because he has nothing else to offer?

    Is LL Cool J an embarrassment to black men because his persona involves the admiration of his physique?

    Would honey magazine or Black Women magazine be wrong for profiling the likes of LL Cool J, Idris Elba, Tyrese and Vin Diesel on the cover of their magazines shirtless?

    If your answer is that the above would be ok–then ask yourself why are you imposing sexist standards on yourself and other black women.


  30. Nef, you are so on point!! I point this out so many time–especially when people rag on Halle Berry. Black folks have swallowed, hook, line and sinker, the negative history FORCED on us concerning black female sexuality. I too tried to find black pin up models, because I’m fascinated by all the rockabilly/pin-up white girls (Dita Von Teese, and even the participants on LJ communities) and wondered why no black women ever get involved in that. I know if I looked like Stacey, I would be posing as a pin-up model in a heartbeat! I think we as women need to address the subconscious acceptance of what we were told is “proper” behavoir for black women. Because really, by black women calling other black women hoes and whores for showing their body, while white women aren’t, and then we turn around a gripe that we aren’t seen as sexy, we’re contradicting ourselves. I admit that black females have been confused about their sexuality and use it in harmful ways, we’ve got to get to the root of the problem and try to solve it.

  31. cosign Mrs Parker and Nef
    They tan to get darker (like us)
    They want full lips (like us)
    Implants in their breast/a** so they can be shapely (like most of us)
    But they never want to respect us. I totally believe it comes from the slavery mentality that was forced on us from long ago.

    Side note: I don’t think of Lola as a whore when I look at her, she actually has a cute face to me. Buffy looks like she just had sex most of the time. Same goes for most of the video vixens. I have no problem with women, Black women being sexy. But sexy and nasty are two different things.

    Oh and Stacy looks good, but she does not hold a candle to Ms Jackson! lol 🙂

  32. So the person over this site is STEPHANIE? If this is correct that is really good that you have this site that we can come to and admire the pics and talk about the comments. Much props. Now don’t you all know that 40 is the new 30? and 30 is the new 20? Stacy, Janet, we all came out the same class. People tell me all the time they thought I was in my 30’s. It’s great. Stacy does look great and I’m not complaining cause the lady is fine, and it’s ok to show off your bod sometimes but I have to agree with Fine-N-Mellow and Ol Skool. She has a teenage son and believe me you dont want your homeboy’s making certain comments about what they would love to do with and to your mom. Yeah Stacy DOES look better than Janet and Mariah!!

  33. Nef:
    I have no problem what so ever with a woman embracing her curves i like to see my sisters’s bodies wich is why i released the soy milk information but its all in the way you do it… and who you represent while you do it….what is the message you’re trying to vehiculate while doing it

    Look at janet’s cover and stacy’s cover? janet is no one’s mother but she kept it classy,stacey has a child but she just let it all out…i’m not judging i always give my opinion and get the hell out but honestly its not about her age because 40 is the new 18 its about more than that…its about her as a woman…

    I know what you’re saying about the white girls-famous-recipe but can’t we do better? i mean we are smarter,prettier,curvier isn’t time to stop “doing it because the white man does it too and its okay” and raise the standards? can’t we think or do higher than that? woudlnt he be nice to see a white girl on the cover of a magazine because she is just a pin up and a sister on an other cover because she achieved something and brought pride to her community?

    I mean if a sister has nothing else to offer than be my guest undress and dance on a pole in front of millions of people while you have a man but seriously would’nt be nice to have more sexy,inteligent sistas that own both of those worlds?

    i’m sexy too and i have been since i was 13..but i overlooked that and went to school trying to reach out to be somebody to add a plus to that body….

    nef would you do a cover like that?

    I feel like one in a million sometimes…

  34. I’ve yet to address the actual cover with Stacy included. I simply had to point out the fact that in my book neither Anna Nicole Smith, nor Pamela Anderson are exceptions to the supposed rule. Neither of these women, from my perception, are perceived to be idealisticaly sexy. More often they’re portrayed to be blatant sexual objects who receive little to no respect from the female community at large. Perhaps there are other white women who may serve as exceptions and who would indeed prove your point. These two in particular however are notorius for having questionable and whorish reputations.

    My reasons for considering Stacey’s cover a wee bit over the top have much more to do with the fact that she has a young son (as do I) who this sort of action may have a negative effect on. Aside from that, her beauty can not and should not be denied. I can only hope to be this fierce in my forties. As for the others mentioned (Buffy, Angel, etc) there are ovious differences between these women and other video vixens and Stacey, Janet and/or Mariah .

    Dark sister I couldn’t have said it better myself.

  35. By comparison……….

    Kelly Rowland’s cover of KING magazine vs. Stacey’s…

    Both beautiful women, we can agree, but there’s an heir of ‘raunch’ 😆 to these covers. At least on Kelly’s because she looked so uncomfortable! Instead of self-hatred and insecurities could it be simply that the cover is just horrid (i.e. Kelly’s) and not so much “I hate that Kelly’s more beautiful than me”???

  36. As a non American there are things about America/culture I admire very much. However I think there seems to be a fanaticism with youth/ physical appearance that is not right. In other cultures people accept getting older and it is not viewed as something terrible and awful. No one is saying that you should not take care of yourself or look good. Whether the person be white/black/Hispanic/ why do you feel that you need to show off your body. To prove what? …that I am still desirable at forty two.
    Of all the things to prove to the world at forty two is that you look good in cut-out pants?

  37. @darksista,

    You have other marketable talents such as an education and career. The women we are discussing are in a field (entertainment) that thrives on public perceptions of beauty and sex appeal. We cannot rightly compare ourselves and our choices to theirs. Its not even apples and oranges–its apples and pigsfeet.

    No, I would not pose for a picture like that on a magazine cover–but I don’t have to–I have a career, but I don’t begrudge those women their right to earn a living.

    I have, however, posed for several photos just like that, and put them in my husbands bag or wallet.


    What, pray tell, is this “obvious difference” to which you refer? From where I sit, naked bootie is naked bootie. It is unfair to say Janet is ok to show her body, but Buffy the Body is nasty. That dear is called “bias” and “prejudice” and it has nothing to do with race but everything to do with irrational and unsubstantiated judgements based on who a person IS rather than what a person DOES. Naked bootie and exposed cleavage is either “ok” or “not ok” without respect to the person on display. My opinion is that I only have the right to control and judge MYSELF, so as long as its not my naked bootie on display, I’m not mad at them.


    Could be sis. Some of us have a set of values that do not permit this kind of behavior and that’s fine. But not all of us have the same values nor should we all be expected to.

    @the people who said Pamela Anderson and cohorts are not sexy, I agree. I was using them as a point of reference only.

    @Stacy having a teenaged son, that is actually the best argument against her photo that I have read. It will probably embarrass him and that is problematic. However, I know more than a few black women who have had multiple men who they “dated” in the presence of their sons. That is just as damaging and upsetting for children.

    I am going to leave it with this tidbit and if you can use it please pick it up and take it with you, if you can’t, then leave it lay….

    SEX is Powerful. Sexual Attractivness is a powerful weapon that women have in their arsenal. This power is at the foundation of why male dominated cultures, have demonized female sexuality. They are hoping that you fall for it so that you never get a grasp on that particular power.

    I’m not talking about outright whorishness, I’m referring to a much more subtle, understated, sensuality that is accessible to women who aren’t so detatched from themselves that they wrongly believe that their sexuality is something that belongs to men…

    It doesn’t. It belongs to you. These women, untalented and slow as some of them might be, have figured out something that most women never will–they figured out how to stop giving away their power and how to profit from it instead.

    Its a picture–its not a sextape.

    Male “girly” magazines like King (and Maxim) have always been around and they always will. King profiles black centerfolds…as well they should. Will you all be happier when only hispanic and white women are on the covers of black magazines? I, for one, will be pissed.

    More power to Stacy, Janet, Trina, Tocarra, Buffy, Melissa, all of them.

    More power to all of you as well. If it doesn’t fit, just leave it.

  38. First of all I have to give props to Stacey for looking this good.

    I think as black women we have been taught to be ashamed of our bodies coz our bodies are overtly sexual coz of all the curves.

    I think that an inteligent woman can still pose for that type pf mag coz she is showing a diferent sid of herself. We dotn have to pick between being sexy and smart, most of us are both.

    I understand that most mothers are worried about the imapct this wil have on her son, but she is just claiming her sexiness as a mother. Most mothers try so hard to hide their sexuality coz they gave birth-sexiness stays a part of u forever if u want. So this is Stacy’s way of feeling sexy-so more power to her.

    How coem we still let the media make us feel bad about our shapes. The reason why white woemn dont get frowned upon is coz their bodies are less voloptuos therefore less sexy.

    Someone said we must check out a pic of Kelly. Truth is Kelly’s body is different from Stacy’s, so even if she was wearing the same outfit, in the same pose, the pic wouldnt have been as overtly sexy-curves highlight the sexual nature.

    And as sistas lets try support each other. Stacy is nothing like Angel Lola Luv and Buffy. So when one of us is sexy without being slutty, lets celebrate it amd give more power.

    If thats what 42 can look like then i cannot wait

  39. ” I don’t begrudge those women their right to earn a living.”

    In this sense we should not judge african americans porn actress,celebrities f-ers, drug dealers,robbers or even prostitutes ? because they are juste trying to make a living one way or the other?

    Sister that do not make any sens to me ,I think that the reason why we would stay the entertainment race for a very longtime is because we are so great at making excuse for each other and it isn’t always good i have been part of it myself and i am ashamed
    what sistas like us should do when they see one of us getting low for money is to remind her who she is and where she came from

    Why don’t you or i take pictures for magazines? why don’t we star in videos? why not? i’m sure its not the shape that is missing but what is the reason why you have enough pride not to do those kind of stuff for strangers? Anf if we don’t do it and still look good and feel good why can’t other sistas do it?

    I cannot and will not support anything like this, and its probably because i was not raised here and i grew up with different values and morals,maybe that’s why i can’t get it !

  40. @Angela and Goldilocs

    Thanks for understanding my point.


    We usually agree, on this we don’t. Its ok. I also don’t begrudge you your right to your opinion.

    I used to think a lot more like you on this topic. I started examining myself and came to an understanding that judging another woman for her expression of herself is not fair and it is rarely unaccompanied by a desire to make oneself feel “better than” by putting someone on a lower level. I decided that I just don’t need that in my life. I am happy with Nef and that’s what I aspire to always be.

    To answer your other questions, we don’t do it because we have other options and ideas. As far as the porn and prostitution question, I don’t judge them either. I don’t understand why the hookers give their hard earned money to a man who didn’t earn it, but beyond that…I don’t have an opinion. I wouldn’t want my daughter to do it. But they aren’t my daughter. I feel the same way about strippers–their body, their life. I’m just not one of those “tsk tsk shame on you” type of women in general.
    Sometime in my life, I grew out of that when I grew out of letting other people”s judgement affect my decisions.

    Finally your comment about not being from here and therefore having morals was somewhat offensive but also proves my point. You apparently believe that black American women have low morals, so you see them/us in that way. When you are looking through “dirty eyes” everything looks dirty…

    The question you have to ask yourself is whether it is the photograph, woman, dance, or song that is dirty, or is it your perception that is dirty…

    I still love ya though sis. I can handle not agreeing, diversity is a good thing.

  41. somebody said she is taking these pics for no reason…..well this is the reason! she got her name coming out of all our mouths and all the mens mouths hanging open! producers and casting directors get to see her and what shape she is in to date so those calls can come rolling in. plus she is proud she CAN and a check came along with all that to boot! as far as her son & his friends technically youngins dont have any business with KING but if it does happen she is just gonna have to sit him down and explain in these times you can shelter your kids cause they will see it and learn it in all the wrong places and they arent stupid so all she can do is be upfront! i had to get things rolling again and its a means of doing that.

    Atleast she isnt buck naked! i have see more tasteless chicks in the grocery store!

    like i said before Pay those bills Stacey! i aint even hating!

    i feel your point and co-sign Nef Choclate!

  42. Who has told women in order for you to be sexy you have to look like you belong on a corner. You can be sexy and do not have to look like a slut. I don’t think everyone needs to know what you have under your clothes.

  43. @nefe that why you is my girl. You be breaking it down for real. Yes i agree with everything you said. It funny how they cater to the white woman like someone up above talk about j.lo and k.kardinesn what eva her last name is lol. It funny how the big booty is on the scene. Now everyone getting there butt done thinking it look good. I can not stand someone getting them butt injections then faulting it like it there. Leave the big booty to the natural beauty women like us lol. It sad how they wants to be like us so bad. WE R THE MOST POWERFUL HUMAN BEING ON EARTH. WE KNOW HOW TO GET IT DONE. NOBODY CAN NOT MESS WITH A SISTA AT ALL. LET ANY OTHER RACE CHANGE LIFE WITH US THEY GO BACK IN A MINUTE. SO SISTA IF YOU BEAUTIFUL STAND UP AND BE PROUD OF YOURSELF BECAUSE I KNOW I AM.

  44. bee,
    I agree!

    Stacy is Killing IT! She looks amazing and guess what SHE CAN DO THIS! Let’s big her up and hope we all look this way at 42. She’s not even old! Why do you have to be 22 to get this. PLEASE GO STACY!!!!!

    LL still showing his almost 50 butt and we love it. I know I do cause he’s FINE. Give credit where credit is due!! 🙂

    BTW I so co sign these people getting these butt injections. WHY? I know madd black girls that’s doing it especially the strippers and video girls. WHY? White women too. So now there tanning or Bronzing themselves, and getting big butts, and weave. Sounds like they are trying to be so black to me!!!! FOR REAL!

  45. Break it down, Nef!
    Although I am not 40, I just say in general. Women, especially Black women (regardless of age) do not need to use their sexuality for profit or attention. Men too. But sadly, they do. As much as we hate to say it, it’s true sex sells, especially if you are trying to sell to men. Do you see Stacey or any other female half naked on Vogue or Essence?? Hell no. In my opinion there is nothing wrong with looking sexy, but there is a difference between sexy and raunchy (however you spell it lol). Wish I could write more, but I am at work. I will have to come back.

  46. I didn’t even know stacy was that age she look great for 42 yrs. I say if u still have it go for it I alway been a fan and if she keep looking like this I will always be. U go sweetheart !!!!!!!!! 42 WOW !!!!!!!

  47. I think people don’t really say anything about stacey because they either don’t know or don’t care. She is pretty but for some reason she died off quickly. I just don’t like that she is fronting like she’s not doing it for money. When it came to playboy she tried to make it like she always wanted to do it etc………..Girl Puh-leeze!

  48. NEF: no girl!!!!!! i meant that where i’m from people get involved! if i see a little girl trying to act grown up even if i don’t know her i would speak on it that’s why i said maybe its because i’m not from here

    But as a mother, a sister and a daugther i just tough that i would like all my sisters to rise above their circumstances the way i want my own people to
    but you’re right i should not care because i don’t know them

    Yet when people say black women we all turn our head … some way videos models, hos, crak head,prostitutes somehow they are our sisters ,daughters,and friends….

  49. We are all free moral agents and therefore we are free to make our own personal decisions. However, with each decision we must weigh the pros & the cons. First ask yourself what is the message being conveyed in posing in such a manner? When someone has their *** in your face what`s the subtle message? Does your mind think on a higher level, or does it spiral to a low level? We, as black people, have truly been Americanized…. Hollywood itself is so SUPERFICIAL. Everything about Hollywood is an illusion and it`s so fleeting. Fame only lasts for a season as people get tired of you because we are all so fickle. Then there`s the other side of it when it comes to the money. Some of us would sell our souls to the devil if it meant making a few dollars; but in the end what do you really have?

    A womans` sexuality is indeed power but to flaunt it in such a manner only begs the question, where is one mentally? If money is a major motive then we are all in for a very rude awakening. Do you not know that The US dollar is declining and is on a downward spiral? The Euro will soon be the top currency in the world as The US dollar inevitably collapses. Seven countries around the world are already planning to shift from The US dollar to The Euro, and they are as follows: Saudi Arabia, South Korea, China, Venezuela, Sudan, Iran & Russia. As of Oct. 2007 Iran receives non-dollar currencies for 85% of its oil exports. The central world banks are planning a massive overhaul from The US dollar with Asia probably being the ring leader.

    Once that happens you`ll have a DOMINO effect with other world banks falling in line. The US debt has soared to around 9 or 10 TRILLION dollars with China being the number one lender. All of this may be a little off point, but my point is we all have a sensationable appetite for money but soon all of our money will be worthless. So why should one sell their soul for something that is on the brink of collapsing. Once the dollar collapses it will ROCK the financial world(As Michael said) of all of us. So really sistas should have more SELF-RESPECT; for in the end it`s priceless…

    P.S. Just remember no matter how much money we chase or if we even make a million dollars in a month, pretty soon it will all be worthless…

  50. I think Stacey Dash looks great. I don’t agree with the pose but in hollywood a woman has to show most of her skin to get attention. King is the type of magazine that mainly displays the model’s rear end. Right now, no woman will get anywhere unless she is half dressed. Unfortunately, we -the American public- are the reason why this is true.
    My only problem is that I sometimes compare myself to the women in the magazines. After sulking about it, I have to (re)convince myself that I need to accept my body. I have to be happy with what I was born with, or rather, everything that developed during puberty. I would love to look like some of the women in King or XXL minus the creative hand of some plastic surgeon.


  52. @darksista

    No…you are right to care about people who you don’t know. What I meant is that perhaps they don’t need help or pity. You and I might not pose bootie out on a magazine, but that doesn’t mean we are necessarily better than them.

    I come from a very strict, modest dressing background (pentecostal) so I do understand what you are saying. I just think that it is wrong to impose our moral ideas on all black women.

    That being said, I’m guilty of it too sometimes. I don’t care for Karrine Superhead…I try to see her perspective, but I just don’t like the chick and I think she is nasty. I also acknowledge that’s me imposing my morals on her–and that its unfair.

    So I’m not pointing a finger at you…I’m also working my way through my own prejudices.

  53. Terrance,
    Reading your post, you sound pretty educated so may I ask you a couple of questions? What should we do right now? Our currency is falling so what can we do right now? I am young and I have a couple of thousand saved. Before I am rendered homeless in the next couple of years, can you give me some advice?

  54. @Terence,

    Your statement suggesting that the concept of sex as a tool for financial security is somehow “americanized” is totally false. I’ve studied African culture and religion from the Kongo to the Gold Coast. Prior to encountering Europeans, we had culturally endorsed ways of transmiTting sexual mores and knowledge to our children. However, make no mistake, some of the most powerful and adored goddesses in West, Central and Southern African cultures, were deities whose personas were and are overtly sexual. Rather than being villified as we do in judeo christian and islamic cultures, they were venerated as part of the necessary balance of life.

    Just as we need Oprahs and Condoleezas, we need Stacys and Beyonces and Buffies. That is balance. Western thought lacks balance and therein lies the root of the psychological distress in this country.

  55. @Nef,
    We don’t have that balance. When one hears the words black woman, they don’t immediately think “intelligent, sexy. beautiful, leader, etc. Most people think whore or welfare queen with 5 kids by 6 different men in 7 different cities. This bothers me because I feel that I can be described by all of the above adjectives plus more.

  56. @Flo

    I feel you sis.

    I think that black people, ourselves, are the most guilty of hearing “black woman” and thinking those things. That’s what I mean by “internalized self hatred”.

    When I hear “black woman” I think about myself, I think about all of you. I don’t think “welfare queen”.

    I came from a small town with few blacks–you would be surprised to know that quite a few schoolmates thought that all black mother were like Claire Huxtable.

    But you are right-we don’t have that balance…and we need it.

  57. Gee Steph,

    You sho know how to stir the pot! LOL I love the site and have thoroughly enjoyed this particular conversation. I still wish Stacey and women in their position inner peace. May we celebrate our unique beauty & harness our personal power for the betterment of mankind & learn what is REALLY important in this life and hold on to that truth.

    Kum-ba-ya My Lord…….LOL

  58. @Stef
    The reason she doesn’t get flak for “not acting her age” as either an actress or a glamour model is well,… because she doesn’t look anywhere near her age! Until she was 35 she was playing teenagers in television and movies. In her late 30s she was playing characters in their early 20s (Lethal Eviction).

    @Nef Chocolatepeach
    “I have been researching black pin-up girls from the 50’s and I couldn’t find a single one.”

    Dorothy Danridge.

    “What we might want to ask ourselves is why Anna Nicole Smith… [is] considered “pretty” and”sexy” when displayed this way, but a black woman is considered whorish, nasty, etc…

    “Answer: racism. Internalized self hatred.”

    Nope. I cosign with @lovingme. Though Pamela Anderson has moved upmarket somewhat, Anna Nicole Smith was a walking punchline because of her debauched behavior. Neither is considered uncritically “sexy” or “pretty.” If the answer is “racism” it’s because the question is leading.

    “I’m not mad at any beautiful sister who gets paid for being gorgeous (not even crazy Naomi…)”

    What is there to be mad at “crazy Naomi” about and why is she crazy? (As an aside, she’s a fashion model not a glamour model like Melyssa Ford or a fetish model like Betti Page was). Is she the only celebrity, white or black, that exhibits privileged behavior? I don’t think she’s ever been arrested for drunk driving or the like–now that’s crazy dangerous behavior–and we can list celebrities who have been.

    “Why is Carmen Electra sexy–but Buffy the Body is a ***?”
    Carmen Electra, a Prince protege, was introduced to the public as a singer while Buffy the Body came into the spotlight as a stripper infamous for her “Thunder Ass Clap.” That difference has nothing to do with race.

  59. ILBW you took the words right out of my mouth. The key difference is indeed the profession of choice.

    Wonderful and interesting dialogue everyone.

  60. flo, my sista ,and terrence’s post make you think a lot
    if we dont think outside the box no one will for us…

  61. @ILBW

    A “pin up” is a woman like Betti Page who was known solely for being a pin up…just like “video girls are known solely for that. Dorothy was an accomplished actress who happened to be photographed. Apples and Pigsfeet again.

    Carmen Electra might have been “introduced” as a singer but she does not sing and was never known for that. She was known for her lOok…period.

    Again your issue with Buffy the Body is a bias. Nothing more. Naked a_ _ is naked _ _ and it is not fair to say one naked a_ _ is ok while another is distasteful. Naked is naked.

    She is known for her “booty clap” and Pamela Anderson is known for sliding down poles…stripping is stripping.

  62. @ILBW

    Regarding Naomi Campbell…please re-read my post. I said I’m NOT mad at her.
    I said “crazy” because in my opinion, it is not SANE for an employer to hit their her employee in the head with a cell phone because the employee upset them. However, for anybody who thinks that is normal–enjoy the abuse. Even so, I respected the way that she handled her community service and I think that every woman is entitled to a little bit of “diva” attitude. Thus “I’m not mad at her.

    Finally, your statement to Stephanie that Stacy gets away with it because her age is not known is not really on point. EVERY blog where I’ve seen this photograph has stated in the caption that she is 42 years old. Her age was not known by many people prior to this, but it is known with regard to this picture.

  63. This just crossed my mind. i think black women hate so much on our own sistas posing like this (myself excluded) because many of us subconsciouslt compare ourselves to them then feel bad about ourselves.

    We dont compare our bodies to the like of Pam Anderson coz we dont evn have the same body tyoes. When we se women like Stacey, we start thinking,”Ive got booty too but i dontlook like that”

    the jealosly creeps in. Lets do better.

    Lets celebrate our beauty not compete coz we all have our own thing going on.

    Stacey has just amde me wanna work out. thats more than i can say about a pic of any white woman.

  64. I think r bodies r beautiful. I rather have the body that i have or any white woman body. I rather have the nappy hair, big lips, curves in my hips, and a nice big booty. Just wonderful beautiful skin. Im 6’1 so i stand up proud and have a switch in my walk lol. I think we need to up lift each other up. If we do stop all this eny of r self we be more worth for each other and r self. Love this site go step.

  65. @goldilocks

    Thank you for saying it…I felt that way throughout the post but I didn’t want to alienate anyone. I honestly do think it is exactly that…women like Stacy, Janet, and the loved and hated Beyonce, make a lot of us feel bad because women compare ourselves to others. But it doesn’t have to be that way. I had not exercised in YEARS after I had my children. One day someone at my job sent around Janets calendar from 20 y/O. My jaw dropped! I thought “I am so proud that she is black…she lost the weight–I know I can too!

    I was inspired. Black women inspire me. I don’t experience jealousy or envy…I never have. (That isn’t patting myself on the back because I have plenty of issues to make up for it)

    I was telling my husband last night that I’m hurt and frustrated because I’m starting to think that black women hate everybody and critisize everybody–especially each other…it was probably estrogen talking…

    Still I don’t understand why we are so judgmental. Why do we have to pick apart other sisters and find flaws.

    I have never seen a black woman who I couldn’t give a compliment. If I think she is beautiful–I will tell her.

    I am really exhausted by the whole concept and yes, to be totally honest, I too believe it has a lot to do with feelings of inadequacy upon seeing a woman who appears “flawless”. Nobody is flawless. Its ok to be beautiful and I believe we all are.

    Anyway, thanks for adding that because I’ve wanted to say it, but was a little too “chicken”.

  66. We was just discussing this topic about Stacy on other site. Alot of us was saying the exact same thing Nef ChocolatePeach, Goldilox and other women on here were saying. I believe if you got it, flaunt it. Atleast you’re not showing off your vag like other raunchy magazines are, that’s straight porn anyway. King, Blackmen, Maxium is not to be compared, but my point is there is nothing wrong with a black woman looking sexy and posing for a men’s magazine.

    I know we here alot of feminist and I’m talking about black feminist always giving thier holier-than-thou lectures about video models and women who pose for Black Men, King, Smooth, etc.
    Like they’ve been wearing turtle-necks and ankle-length skirts all thier lives. Naturally I couldn’t stand Tip Drill or when men say “Look at that b*tch go etc, that’s just borderline degrated and disrespected, but those are not compared to the sexy but decent videos I’ve noticed. Such as Jay-z Excuse Miss or LL Cool J’s Hey Lover. However even women who played in those videos has been somewhat critized. For years, I’ve seen women like Melyssa Ford, Buffie the body, Esther Baxter, and now Lola Luv on magazine covers, but I’ve yet to see them on any degrated rap videos, that’s a good thing.

    I really don’t know what these feminist are talking about, especially considering that they applaused Karrine Steffens for giving her “sad speech and life changing speech” but has she changed? No. I bet if LL Cool J, Boris Kodjoe or Idris Elba appeared shirtless on Essence or any other black women’s magazine, we wouldn’t be hearing nor seeing any feminist speeched about them. “He needs to put on a suit, he’s degrading black men by having his shirt off.” Lol, Girl Bye! You know damn well you will buy that magazine, I know I would.

    Like some of the sistas on here and other sites been saying….It’s jealously. It couldn’t be nothing else, even if Stacy had on clothes somebody would still have “something to say”. Look at the love-hate relationship women have for Beyonce or Lola Luv. If Stacy Dash was 25 people would still have “something to say”. I don’t think age has anything to do with it.

  67. Its my opinion that a women of a certain age, if confident in who she is does not need to show her backside in this matter to be sexy. I am in no ways a hater, I think a women should always look her best, be confident, and exude some sex appeal, not matter what age. But the way in which you do that is where I might have a problem. When I was younger in my college days, I used to put on the skimpiest, tightest, shortest, most revealing outfit I could find, in order to show my sexy. Now at 30 I step out dressed, I still show off my best assets like some cleavage, legs, hips and behind but it is much more tastefully done. That’s right I leave a little room for the imagination. I still get told that I’m sexy and beautiful. Stacy and Mariah are beautiful, sexy, talented sistas with great bodies no matter what they where on the cover of a magazine. So I think many ask they question what are they trying to prove by dressing like this?

  68. @Nef:

    I hear you loudly & clearly and I concur with you. I have also studied our African cultures and customs and it`s true that we did have balance. That`s why there was The God and The Goddess. You also have God and Satan; and most people may find it hard to phantom but Satan is a necessity for he is that which gives balance to God. In other words you have the positive and the negative. Balance does give the world order, so therefore you have male and female, night and day and positive and negative. When I made my statement about us having been Americanized I was more or less referring to our values in the sense of the material as opposed to the spiritual. The Europeans have taught us, and very well I might add, to look upon material gain, wealth and physical appearance as something of great value. Back in The Mother Land it was more about spirituality.

    That`s why we were so in tuned with The Cosmos as well as The Creator. We were in a sense all one. However since our sojourn here in The West we lost that due to an evil and corrupt society that has purposelessly denied us the knowledge of self. However, in some ways we strive to be like Europeans and yet even today we are still not fully classified as citizens. Today(2008) in The Constitution, Article 1-SECTION 2-Clause 3 it still classifies us as 3/5 of a human being believe it or not. Yes sexuality was expressed in The Mother Land long before we encountered Europeans. The difference is with Western standards it`s done in a way to entice. It`s also true that back in Africa we had a much higher order of society for The Creator was the natural sustainer of our being and our ancestors recognized this. Here in this West it`s more or less a Satanic rule beginning with The Vatican in Rome.

    So we are being bombarded by Satan on two fronts; The Spiritual and The Material. While Satan is a necessity to give balance it is this war that we must reign victorious in order to re-connect with The Creator. This is a battle that rages on daily in our everyday lives; the battle of good versus evil. The two are always warring within us, therein you have God versus Satan. Anyway, getting back to The Motherland we are a great people as our history bears this out. Just looking at the wonder of The Pyramids one realizes the superior knowledge of our ancestors when it came to architect. Precise measurements down to the cubic. The mathematics, the sciences, medicine, philosophy, the cosmos, etc. Everything The West has is stolen legacy from The Mother Land. Now we are here in The West having to unlearn this Satanic culture for it is the only way for us to re-connect with The Creator. That was my thought behind The Americanized statement. However, in the end we are brothas & sistas and we can once again be the great people that we are…

  69. Stacy Dash looks great for her age. I think if you got it, baby, show it off, and not to mention, she’s showing it in a sexy but tasteful fashion. At 25, I’m looking pretty good, but I sure hope to still have it in the same place like she does when I’m her age! I do think that the booty is a major asset in the Black culture and if it’s right and tight, praise it. I don’t think people should go and make the issue deeper than what it really is; a beautiful woman in a piece of lingerie with a fine ass. Period. Reading deeper than that just illustrates and idenitifies the haters.

  70. @Nef Chocolatepeach

    “A “pin up” is a woman like Betti Page who was known solely for being a pin up…. Dorothy was an accomplished actress who happened to be photographed.”

    Nope. The most famous pin-ups (especially from that era) were the actresses: Marilyn Monroe, Brigitte Bardot, Sophia Loren… Bettie Page was a pin-up and fetish model. Google “pin-up,” look it up on wikipedia.

    “Finally, your statement… Stacy gets away with it because her age is not known is not really on point. EVERY blog where I’ve seen this photograph has stated in the caption that she is 42 years old.”

    Eh, we can throw this one in the wind. I don’t read many blogs and this is the only culture blog I read. But when I have heard her discussed in casual real-world conversation people are unaware of her age.

    “Again your issue with Buffy the Body is a bias. Nothing more. … it is not fair to say one naked a_ _ is ok while another is distasteful.”

    My issue with Buffie is lust. Asides from that, there is a non-racial professional difference between her and Carmen Electra who you compared her with.

    But real talk–I am a guy who really has an issue with all these depictions of women as toys. Enough already! Like @flo said it’s not balanced at all an it cannot be defended on ancient-historical precedent. There are too many hyper-sexualized depictions of black women–just like the excessive hyper-macho depictions of black men. I don’t care if Buffie, 50 or some non-black puppetmaster makes the money, it hurts us. The constant lopsided emphasis teaches us–and others about us–our main values are sex and violence. And our youth get mistaken and misled and try to fulfill what they see as their value. Every young person? No. You personally? Probably not. But that many black youth misunderstand their value and misapply themselves is statistically obvious.

    I am definitely not a hater of these women or their macho-man counterparts. And I am not a stick-in-the-mud. But I come here for the gallery of glamourous, well-appointed, smiling black women. It is encouraging to me, to succeed. Buffy is discouraging to me. (Pamela Anderson et al is irrelevant to me.)

  71. @flo
    “I am young and I have a couple of thousand saved. Before I am rendered homeless in the next couple of years, can you give me some advice?”

    I am not a financial advisor (so you can ignore the rest and be none the worse for it). Everyone’s goals and circumstances are different but yunno, go to the library pick up a financial advice magazine like Kiplinger’s Personal Finance, take out the subscription card and order the magazine for ten cents and issue for a year. It’ll introduce you to saving and investment strategies. They often run articles / contest about your exact question, e.g., “What to do with a thousand dollars.” Or subscribe to Black Enterprise magazine and order their free Wealth-Building Kit.

    I think in general, it’s recommended to build a nest egg, pay down credit, and invest in yourself through education (depending on your circumstances). If you think the changes Terence wrote about precipitate an economic storm, you can, for example, build a six-month living expense buffer against the downturn (unemployment rates are a benchmark of depressions and recessions–rates are high and people are out of work longer). But I dunno, so go to expert resources KPF or BE!

  72. @Terence

    I enjoyed your post. Wealth and Spirituality were more congruent in our traditional cultures. We can’t return to that unless we really examine the forces that have polluted our minds and block us from being able to appreciate and embrace those ways of thought. Good post.

  73. @ILBW

    In terms of your feelings about it as a man–I can appreciate that. It is wonderful to know that young men value and appreciate black women for traits outside of physical or sexual appeal.

    With all due respect, however, that sentiment was never my point. While it is great that you value women for their minds–it concerns me that any person, a man in particular, thinks they have some right to assert control over what a woman (who is not their woman) chooses to do with her body. It is HER body. It belongs to HER.

    From that perspective (that this is an issue of women’s freedom and right to control their own body) I have to honestly tell you that I’m not putting an incredible amount of weight on what men think about it. You do not know the underlying issues, the incredibly sensitive issues surrounding black female sexuality, black female body image, or black female beauty issues. Those issues are AS sensitive to black women as the issue of financial worth is to black men. It touches us in the same place as the issue of manhood=wealth touches black men. That makes it emphatically an issue of self actualization and self power that black women have to work out among ourselves.

    As a man, ( if she so chooses,)you can enjoy it, you can share it if she is wiling, you can admire it, you can detest it–but you have no right to assert control over it. That control is between her and God who gave it to her. As such, she owes nobody an explanation for her choice besides her God.

    That is truly the basis of my point. We—men AND women, have a lot of nerve siting back judging anybody about what they CHOOSE to do with what God gave them.

    WE may not like it, We may not AGREE with it, We may NEVER engage in it, but that doesn’t negate their free will and right to do it. Especially something as inconsequential as a photograph on a magazine cover. It isn’t as though its Black Tail magazine.

    As to pin ups. I know what they are and I didn’t need wikipedia to know it. I didn’t say anything about what pin ups were the most famous. I was commenting on the fact that there were no black women who were famous for being pin-ups. I realize it is a subtle distinction–but it is an important distinction. It changes the entire understanding of what I said to you–which explains why you misinterpreted it. That being said, I do agree with you that Dorothy Dandridge and Marilyn Monroe are/were equivalents.

    I’m not going to debate Carmen Electra’s “profession” with anyone. From my point of view–she is famous for her looks and for her sexual persona. That was the comparison that I made. I agree with you as to her irrelevancy outside of my point of comparison. She was a reference point-but I’ve said that already several times.

    With regard to Buffy the Body-it is what it is. I didn’t say the woman was a brain surgeon…I simply said that she gets villified for doing the same thing that white women get praised for doing and that her brown skin is the reason.

    THat is my perspective and I am fine with the fact that we disagree. I don’t think you are stupid or wrong or insane for your opinion..I simply think we disagree. That is fine with me and I don’t intend to continue trying to come to a consensus with you.

  74. The problem is with alot of women today is that they are way too judgmental of another woman’s life decisions. If a woman wants to strip than that is her business. If you have high morals as a lady then I don’t think that that is fair for you to push your morals upon someone else.

    Now as far as Stacy Dash, I always thought that she was beautiful and she looks great for her age however like what Stephanie said there are alot of hypocritical comments coming from black women regarding Stacy Dash posing seductively. I’ve heard way too much negativity on Madonna, Janet, and Mariah showing skin and have been criticized badly for it. My thing is that it is only grotesque when their bodies are not in order and clearly their bodies look better than some younger women.

    I also want to point out the hypocrisy of some women being okay with entertainers showing skin but highly criticize video vixen or model vixens for doing the same. I think that is just over-rationalizing, prejudice, and playing favoritism. I can honestly tell you that the reason why I like Janet and Madonna because they were unafraid to express their sexuality to the world because when women do it, they are labeled as whores. I just think that is just idiotic. Posing nude or half-nude does not equate of being a whore. Being whore is giving your vagina to every man and sight. This has been an legitimate argument that I’ve heard so far of video vixens defending themselves and not one pro-feminist woman has replied back with out an idiotic response.

    My thing is that every entertainer has to sell some sex appeal. Some are extreme or more subtle than others because we human being are also sexual beings. Men are way more open with sex topics than women because that goes back to us being too judgmental. I can give you an example, I only had one female friend that was open to talk about masturbation, oral sex, and even anul sex (even though I don’t engage in doing that) however the main point is that we were open with our sexuality without us being judgmental. We were also close with two other friends who have feminist views so discussing sex and what we like was uncomfortable for us lol . Selling sex is to sell a sexual fantasy such as stripping, porn, posing nude etc. I don’t see any harm in sexual fantasies.

    Oh yeah Nef, thanks for holding it down here in your opinion because I haven’t ran into many women who were open such as yourself regarding sex. although I’m your younger than you and usually it is said that younger woman are more open and I’m going to say that is false. I usually don’t open up to topics like this if I know another woman is other than that I just keep my mouth shut lol to avoid the terrible criticism.

  75. @dani

    I used to be just like the women I’m arguing with over this topic. Coincidentally, when I was that way–judgmental, critical, and constantly “taken aback” by another sister’s choices—I was also miserable and negative.

    If we black women are going to be fighting mad about anything related to sex–let us be fighting mad over the massive number of black women and girls being infected with HIV by men who claim to love them. Let’s be critical and taken aback over the black women and girls in the Sudan and the Congo who are being raped by soldiers and have no protection against it. Let’s be outraged and yelling “shame on you” to the men who are molesting little girls and the mothers who are letting it happen just to keep a man in their lives.

    I’m sorry–but in the face of the above, Stacey Dash’s butt-cheeks being exposed on King, or the fact that Trina always does pictorials before her album–just don’t seem horrible to me. Maybe if more women were taught that their bodies belonged to THEM and that they had ultimate control over what to do–and not to do with it–Sisters would not think twice about telling a man to wear a condom or get out of her bedroom.

    There are a lot of sexual issues that face black women everyday that are real and serious and crucial to our survival. I refuse to exert energy critisizing another sister over a photograph in the face of all of this. If a person just MUST be self-righteous, then get self-righteous about something that actually matters.

    Babies are getting raped and molested, black women are dropping like flies from AIDS and sisters want to sit around cluck clucking and tsk tsk tsking because a 40plus woman is wearing a bikini or thong or because a bigg butt woman is dancing in a video.

    We’ve got to get a grip on what’s real and what’s important. Own your body–so you can protect it, and let other sisters own theirs.



  78. What is the difference between her cover and Cameron Diaz cover of GQ? Cameron is showing her body too. What is the difference between Models on the Sport Illustrated Swimsuit Cover???

  79. What is the difference between her cover and the Sports Illustrated Swim suit Edtion?

  80. @Nef Chocolatepeach
    “If we black women are going to be fighting mad about anything related to sex–let [it be] over the massive number of black women and girls being infected with HIV,… [and at] the men who are molesting little girls…”

    I don’t think anyone posting in preference of a more balanced portrayal of black women in the media:
    1. argues Stacey Dash should not have the “right” to pose ass-out,
    2. are not “fighting mad” about HIV or sex abuse, or
    3. deserve to be called “judgmental” in an ad hom way when the have valid arguments for wanting fair portrayal of black women in media.

    This is America and we all recognize and cherish our rights, particularly our right to free expression. Not _one comment to this entry says otherwise. But alongside the rights we recognize and cherish the _responsibilities we have as black people to one another. Does being black just mean having genes from populations in Africa? No… but that’s the basis of it. Does it only mean having the history of the same issues, the same blows meted out to us, as a particular minority group in this society? No, but that’s more of it. Does it mean that we have interest to address our hurtful condition in a _concerted manner, in love? Yep, that’s a lot of it. Blackness is that fellowship, not just genes, issues or history. And fellowship requires responsibility. For example, the responsibility to address issues of gender discrimination and sex abuse, to make the fellowship stronger, to remove the hurt and keep it away. Is sex abuse a terror in our community?* Yes, Yes, Yes!! Do young people have much to learn–young boys to learn violence (abuse) is not the basis of their identity and young girls that sex is not the basis of theirs–in order to stop this scourge (and that of HIV that stems from the same self-misunderstanding)? Yes!! So should we want to curtail depicting ourselves as over-sexed and over-aggressive to help them better identify themselves?


    I am a man. With no children, but a young niece and a young nephew. And my heart breaks, breaks, when I see them play at the roles they see in videos, magazines, recite some music from the radio, &c. It breaks. There is one way out of our condition. And it’s up.

    I am proud of the people on this board so please don’t assume that we, who disagree with you are “judgmental” and thereby “miserable and negative” like you were. Don’t be suspicious of us. I am not of you. I assume _every poster to this board wants men to better respect women, and women to better respect themselves; we just disagree about the role more balanced media images can play towards that end.

    Peace @Nef.

    (*I have seen no evidence that sexual abuse is any more rampant in the black community than the larger one.)

  81. I must say Justice you are correct. I also agree with Nef on this topic. I have no problem with older women-or any woman- who shows off her goods…for a magazine. I don’t have a problem when women wear certain clothing that shows off their lovely figure for I do the same. Women who don’t look this good like to show skin, that’s when the issue should be brought up. We have all seen the women at Wal-mart with some horrible get-up Satan designed to slowly kill us while shopping. I wonder about the lack of self respect some sisters have unfortunately been unfairly dealt.

  82. I too worry about the AIDS epidemic. I worry about drugs, murders, welfare, childabuse, social service, self-hatred, ignorance, etc. Why have all these plagued our community? Why are our young men killing each other over “territory” that their parents didn’t pay for?!! How has the AIDS virus shifted in such a way that the majority of new cases per year fall on our women? How did welfare manage to take the place of a man in black homes? Why do the Koreans own almost all beauty supply stores in the black communities? Why are we supporting them?
    There are so many questions yet no one can answer them. I feel sometimes that the black race in America is too ignorant to do anything on our own. We depend on what white people think of us yet no one notices.
    Sorry this post has nothing to do with the beauty of Stacey Dash or any 40+ woman out there. All women are beautiful in some way. I not to long ago started to recognize the beauty in American black women minus the weave…lol.

  83. There is no difference. The only issue is that black women must tiptoe around somethings…sex being one of them. Like I said before, we are not seen as beautiful, intelligent, easygoing, wealthy, or even soft spoken. Attractive-yes. Sexy-yes. Exotic-(think Naomi Campbell or Alek Wek )-yes. Beautiful-(a big one in the black female psyche)-no unless you look like Halle Berry or Beyonce. Then you can physically compete with the other races. We are seen as loud, ghetto, welfare queens or as flat out w*hores. We have to tiptoe around the issue of sex for it can backfire in our faces. We don’t have the power to speak for ourselves…we speak for the whole race and everyone-black, white, etc-wil only see the negative.

  84. @ILBW

    Whether or not sex abuse is rampant in the mainstream community is not relevant to my post. My post concerns the Black community and it ius my position that even one victim is one too many.

    I made none of the assumptions that you listed and I have said repeatedly, to more than one poster “you are entitled to your opinion as I am to mine”.

    Finally, as I stated before to you directly, I don’t intend to continue to debate with you. We disagree and that is fine with me. I can respect your right to have your viewpoint without necessarily agreeing with it.

  85. I’m a mature and successful 27 year old business-owner and I’m loving it. My mother has aged well. People think she is my sister!

    I hope that I don’t have all these issues when I get over 35. None of my older friends do. But, then again, they all have bodies like Stacy Dash. She be pissin women her age off, maybe?

    Well, I have a great body and I like attention. I go to runway fashion shows and everything–swim suits, night wear, you name it. I get some flack, but I got even more flack from black people when I tried to start my own Insurance agency!

    On the other hand, I am an active member of my community. I help blacks start their own businesses and invest in the stock market. YES, my business suits are form-fitting, and that flatter my hour-glass figure. I do not apologize. I will not apologize.

    There are women dressing in basketball jerseys and baggy pants that are spreading AIDS and sleeping with your man more than the more sexually attractive ones are. The woman may be over-weight or not exactly the current standard of beauty. She might just be plain ugly–inside and out. And I know and understand the pain of disloyalty and infidelity!


    Stephanie is an intelligent woman though. I see what you are trying to get at, but your intentions are not all that good. Your language, coupled with the context would almost have me fooled. I’m not slow, just a bit opinionated. I wouldn’t dare view any opposing thought, word, deed, or action as “below” me. That’s immature and just plain condescending. As if someone will think not to post their opinion based on your presumptuous judgment of it.

    My 40 year old friend NINA is HOT TO DEATH and many many women her age hate her. I guess that’s why we are such close friends.

    There is always someone who looks better than you, especially as we age. That’s just a fact. Hell, I wouldn’t mind having my 19-year-old body back!! COME BACK!!

    I think that my contentment with who I am and what I look like made me see the cover of the article and say: “wow! she is smokin hot…moving on.” She’s an adult making her own choices. Don’t turn this stunning creature into an AIDS epidemic. I’m assuming that as a mature, 40 year old woman, she has protected sex and takes care of her body…

    With that said, this post has some very intelligent women, unlike others that I have been too! God bless all of you.

  86. Yes I hear you, FLO and ILBW! You are saying it right.

  87. @darksista

    Where are you sis? I hope I didn’t lose my friend over this post. We can agree to disagree and still be girls. Come on back out I miss you.

  88. there is nothing wrong with a woman in her 40s showing her body if its done tasteful and if they look good

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