I like you. I respect you. I even value our friendship but I don’t love you — at least not the way you love me. And in all honesty, I wouldn’t date or sleep with you if I had no other options. Not to sound harsh, but I’m really NOT interested in you.
Have you ever been there? That awkward place, that awkward time that led to that awkward conversation. It’s one of the worst places to be when the feelings aren’t mutual.
How many times have you started a friendship making it clear that you just wanted to be friends? How many times have you networked with someone and made it clear that it was just business? How many times have any of those people had “the talk” with you?
You know “the talk.” The “I want more or we could be” talk. Haven’t you sat there before, almost frozen? Thinking to yourself what you did wrong to make them think that there could be more.
I’ve run my actions through my head on many occasions. Thinking to myself, if I said I only wanted friendship and I acted accordingly—how did we get here?
Don’t you sometimes feel like the bad guy or like you’re being punished? I’m the bad guy for having to hurt this persons feelings and I’m being punished because I can’t seem to have a lasting friendship with someone of the opposite sex.
Once you have “the talk”, it’s difficult to be the innocent friends or partners that you started out as. You will often feel uncomfortable or guarded. I hate that. I hate living life not trusting. It’s not like every man is knocking on my door but its been enough to just make me uncomfortable.
In all reality, as much as we hate to be there, it seems like it’s an inevitable landing place. While my friends would tell you that you should take it as a compliment, I know that its frustrating and unwanted attention.
I realize that I’m not one of the guys. I get it. But when people cross the line they take the fun out of the friendship. Its not innocent anymore.
So as much as I’ve fought this life lesson, its getting harder to believe in woman and men friendships. I have a couple that I believe are genuine but theres a growing list of them that I’m just not too sure about.